What are Ethical Wills and Why Write One?
A commentator noted, “Legal Wills bequeath valuables; Ethical Wills bequeath values.”
This sums up the purpose of an ethical will. Its biblical roots date back 3,500 years when Jacob gathered his 12 sons around him while on his deathbed and he articulated moral guidance and burial instructions. Then the practice was oral and it evolved into writing. An Ethical Will is nonlegal and no rules exist as to its form. However, our workshops include a workbook to spark ideas and to guide you. Some call an Ethical Will a “Legacy Letter.”A legal document called a codicil also can alter a will.
When I practiced law with my late father, Carl Morgenstern, we drafted many wills. For safekeeping, we offered clients the option of having their original wills kept in our ornate safety deposit box at the First National Bank in Hamilton, Ohio, where our office was located. We gave each client a copy. I always felt the process was special, listening to our clients’ legacy plans in the safe and confidential confines of our law office. Then we made a second appointment to review the will draft and to witness their wills to comply with Ohio law.
An Ethical Will naturally complements a regular statutory will, which has strict, state-specific requirements. A New York Times article explains that Ethical Wills are “a way to counter the cold legalese of wills and trusts…an ethical will says who I am…even sometimes helping soothe ruffled feathers when dispensing family assets.” (NYT 10/31/14.)
Who Writes Ethical Wills?
Today, men and women of every age, ethnicity, faith tradition, economic circumstance and education level see the writing of an ethical will as part of their legacy. This according to Ethical Wills & How to Prepare Them, edited by Rabbi Jack Riemer & Dr. Nathaniel Stampfer.
Click Here for examples from Ethical Wills & How to Prepare Them.
Here are two more examples of what can be included in an Ethical Will. There are no rules, however, an easy format is to just write a letter. Here is a letter I wrote to my children because I wanted them to know that they come from brave and resilient stock amidst terrible fear and suffering. I wrote about their grandparents, my parents, Carl and Marilyn Morgenstern. This letter is about their experience in the 1950s with polio, which my mother contracted after I was born. It also is about medical miracles and the small-town community of Hamilton, Ohio, which united to battle this devastating, highly communicable disease.
Click Here to read my Ethical Will.
The second writing again concerns polio. It is from a selection of Ethical Wills from the American Jewish Archives in Cincinnati, Ohio, a document study led by Dr. Gary P. Zola, Executive Director Emeritus. Cincinnatian Jane Meinrath Bloch wrote this ethical will from her hospital room where she was confined to what became known as an “iron lung” after contracting polio. From what many would consider a physical prison, she wrote an achingly beautiful letter to her then 15-year-old son Peter Bloch on May 4, 1963, full of hope and optimism.
Click Here to read Jane Meinrath Bloch’s Ethical Will.
I am back from Tucson, Arizona, where I participated in an Ethical Will Workshop and, among other things, discovered a deep connection between memoir writing and writing an ethical will. At the very least, they are both adventures of personal discovery and, hopefully, understanding and a reconciliation of sorts. At the most, you have a say in how you are remembered. —Barb
Ethical will advocate Scott Zucker offers a fresh take on mortality and legacy in this beautifull talk about legacy writings and ways we can capture and pass on personal values, family histories and lessons learned to future generations. When he is not spreading the word about ethical wills, Scott practices law at Weissmann Zucker Euster.